Hey Riley,

I tentatively agree. Yet age (I’ve got about 15 years on you) cautions me to temper our disapprobation with patience. Even now, in 2021, we’ve arrived ahead of our sweet spot in history. I don’t expect to see the kind of systemic change you pine for in my lifetime.

Make no mistake, there is coming a time when the gauche attitudes of the many are mere anachronistic embarrassments. But the pace of the change is glacial and while we should never stop resisting there is a point at which we’re kicking against the pricks and merely hurting ourselves.

You know, as do I, that there are decent people in the world who will love us for who we are. Who engage with whatever genitalia we have at any given moment with only one thought in mind: our sexual pleasure. These people don’t care for how that might reframe them in society’s eyes. Right now that’s an admirable iconoclasm. But soon the facile objections of the haters will be exposed as the retrograde thought turds they undoubtedly are.

It’s a fine line between appeasement and not antagonising idiots who will never be taught. To clarify, pointing out that genital preferences are wrong is a fine moral position to take, but transphobes differ not a jot from any other stripe of bigot in that they immediately slap down the victim card for simply being called.

Ah, what am I saying. Fuck em. Not gonna even edge appeasement by not calling a transphobe what they are. Fucking bigots.

It’s just hard to know how hard to yell. I wonder if people seeing my wife and I exchange PDAs isn’t more effective in normalising the love of trans bodies, than me spitting invectives at other people’s small-mindedness.

Just a thought.

Much love, many hugs


Capricious by name, steadfast by nature. Trans femme dyke. Smutsmith. Provocateur. Witch. Poet. Slut. Idiot. Kicking names and taking ass.