My privilege and my pleasure, Oak.

I may be early in my actual transition but my dalliances and battles with gender variance have been a feature of my life for over 40 years.

It’s a measure of progress that the societal pressures that dogged me so thoroughly into a self-policed closet are slightly less prevalent. However, what you’ll never hear me say is that your generation has things any easier. It’s a facile and privileged position to argue.

Firstly, the internal struggle of trans people seems to me to not have changed significantly since I was a kid. Granted, the net means you enjoyed a more readily available community and resources by which you might have stumbled on someone like yourself sooner than I, part of a generation for whom our touchstones in the media were typically paraded on the likes of Jerry Springers bear pit of a show.

However, the net has also amplified the voice of anti-trans vectors.

So secondly, your generation has weathered far more direct abuse than mine did, arguably.

And worse, the increased visibility of trans people, thanks to the democratising solidarity that the net proves a gateway to, has resulted in a corresponding increase in anti-trans rhetoric.

So I fear there’s little comfort I can give in terms of the progress of trans folx in our societies.

However, as I mentioned in my earlier post, even outside my own trans identity, life has through sufficient shit my way that I have had ample cause to be amazed at what we can weather.

I firmly believe this for each of us individually. But moreover with a hefty dose of the solidarity displayed in articles like yours, in reaching out for, and linking arm with our trans fam, I know we’ll prevail.

Any time you want to talk, about anything, I’m all ears.

Much love from your big sister.


Capricious by name, steadfast by nature. Trans femme dyke. Smutsmith. Provocateur. Poet. Idiot. Kicking names and taking ass.

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