So…I’m 49 and I’ve already been my wife’s full time carer for 15 years. I came out 14 months ago in an act of self-preservation that was also to protect my ongoing care of my wife. I too have been accused of selfishness, especially as at the time my wife was still undergoing care for breast cancer, on top of her existing disabilities.
All I’d offer in that regard is that for those naysayers there was NEVER going to be a right time. Had your wife been in perfect health and all the rest of your life on an even keel they’d have said the same thing.
I’m sorry for your loss. But I’m happy that you’re grasping life’s opportunities, as yourself.
Much love, many hugs.