Wow, Oak! That’s quite the watershed. I decided on my name 20 months ago but only changed it legally a month ago. Only my wife and family (the former having filed for the divorce, the latter ejected from my orbit for their continued disrespect) still called me Chris (or even Christopher in the case of my family, a name I ditched in my first legal name change some 6 years ago).

And new name just damn works. It has for a good while now. There was no Damascean revelatory epiphany of the moment as for yourself but there was a kicker when my wife had to call me Abbie to get my attention.

For myself, just yesterday, did come an epiphany. I’ve had a few times of feeling on point in my presentation. Maybe that built but I was miming to Strange Design by Uh Huh Her in the mirror while getting ready and for the first time only saw a woman. A woman nearing 50 sure but a woman nevertheless. I’m only 6 weeks into E so that’s not it. And my makeup wasn’t stellar. It’s just… Well, it feels like I’ve been letting go. Of ‘him’. On Thursday I went on a date (my first since 1992. Don’t. Say. A. Word.) with another woman. And not trying to act a male role in that mileau has accelerated the process of letting go, I think.

So congratulations, Oak, my handsome trans masc enby friend. Here’s to many more milestones on the long and winding (‘windy’, for shame… 😜) Road to who we always were.

Much love, many hugs,


Capricious by name, steadfast by nature. Trans femme dyke. Smutsmith. Provocateur. Poet. Idiot. Kicking names and taking ass.

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